This blog post was SO good. About asking the Lord to help you see your child the way He sees them, past all their behaviors, to who they truly are ( http://everybitterthingissweet.com/2012/02/taking-her-from-the-streets/).
Love this quote,
"Put Feelings on a back-burner. This is not the time for Feelings. Live a material life instead: wake, dress, eat, walk. Let your hands and words mother the new child, don't pause to look back, to reflect, or to experience emotions. "Shut up, Emotions," you'll say. "I'll check back with you in six months to see if you've pulled yourselves together. But no whining meanwhile!"
and
"Let yourself off the hook. This is not your fault. You’ve done a grand thing—you’ve gone out into the world in search of a child and, despite every obstacle over tens of thousands of miles, you’ve brought the child home. It's all going to work out in time. Meanwhile, you’re exhausted. This is all really hard. If it were easy, everyone would do it. You’re doing fine. Just rest up, find something to laugh about, and give Feelings the month off."
"Sin is what happens when our love gets disordered. And it’s never worth disordering the heart to get a right-ordered house.
How is my love ordered? Towards a Better Homes and Gardens House? Or a better, holy, godly heart?
A right-ordered house isn’t virtuous like a right-ordered heart.
It’s true: I could close my eyes to the magma of mess. But the thing is: Love isn’t blind. Love is the holy sight.
Love has the long, real sight, that sees what won’t burn up. Love’s priorities are things unseen. " Ann Voscamp
I agree with the exhaustion aspect of adoption - a picture I carry in my mind is of you sitting on the floor playing with the children after supper - probably around 7:00; your arm resting on the couch, your head on your arm - and you are fast asleep! Your days start early, 5:00 am, and for the first month, you were up every hour at night. This following your whirlwind week getting ready for your trip to Ethiopia, a week of no sleep while you were there, the trip home with no sleep....exhaustion doesn't really begin to describe it!! You are so hard on yourself, Mary, but maybe that is also what makes you such a good mother. You never quit or take the easy road or expect someone else to come along and do it for you. You love your children, each one, fiercely and with great devotion....and don't ever let your emotions tell you otherwise! I couldn't be more proud of you.
ReplyDeleteHi, I'm Anne, and I just found your blog through Fostering a Blessing. Looking forward to exploring more. Pop on over to my blog sometime if you have a minute, and say hi! Bringing Borya Home (http://bringingboryahome.blogspot.com).
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