Lists

* the boys being Indians (?)

The other day Eli and Micah wanted to make "lists." They brought us a piece of paper and pen, and wanted to hold the pen with us as we wrote down what they told us. I think they are supposed to be a list of things they like, but a couple of times they sort of diverged from that a little bit. :) We just wrote exactly what they told us, if it made sense or not. After we made them, they wanted me to read them out loud over and over, and they would just dissolve in giggles!

Eli's List
1. Sally (his stuffed monkey he sleeps with)
2. Sarah (both my cousin who babysits, and another stuffed monkey, Sally's mother, that he sleeps with)
3. Polar bear (the bear he got from my brother and sister-in-law for being their ring bearer)
4. Batman shirt
5. Batman underwear
6. Lightning McQueen pajamas
7. Mountain Lions
8. I want mom to stay home (apparently I had gone out for the evening)
9. I love mom
10. I think you're special
11. Daddy's thumb is super big
12. I like eating popcorn during movies
13. Summer shirts (sleeveless shirts)
14. Shorts
15. Going on a trip
16. Granola
17. Mom
18. Dad
19. Workers
20. Our house is so pretty
21. Diego legos are my best
22. Frogs
23. Saw a frog at the pond
24. Caught 3 fish
25. Saw a waterfall and so many dead fish
26. Making a mask
27. I'm glad I went to Wal-Mart with mom really early
28. Going to the Jungle at the zoo
29. Honey
30. Tag baba (his little blanket he sleeps with that he has had since he was a baby)
31. Super heroes
32. Chocolate milk
33. Coloring
34. Eating cereal
35. Fishing

Micah's list
1. Lion (stuffed animal he sleeps with)
2. Playing games
3. Super heroes
4. Chuckie Cheese
5. Toys at the store
6. Bounce U, because we got a pen
7. Hiking
8. Camping
9. Fishing
10. Bringing lunch when we go fishing
11. My mom and dad are the best
12. Eli is my best brother
13. Seeing animals
14. Going to the museum
15. Riding on trains
16. Going to the zoo
17. Making crafts
18. Going to preschool
19. Eating snacks and watching a movie
20. Predators
21. Eating dessert and watching a movie
22. Climbing trees
23. Wish I could be someone who saves people by swinging through the jungle
24. Painting, coloring, and writing pictures
25. Going to the farm
26. Nana and Papa's house
27. Getting magazines in the mail, and reading books
28. Playing
29. Running races
30. Bugs
31. Eating candy

Isaac turns 2

Today is Isaac's 2nd birthday! I seriously feel like this kid was a baby for like an hour. He has grown up SO fast! He is such a sweet boy, makes us laugh all the time, lets us know LOUD and clear when he is not happy about something, and reminds me constantly of the joys of being a mom.

Aaron and I put up our now expected birthday decorations, which received HUGE smiles when we came downstairs, I made chocolate chip teddy bear pancakes for breakfast, and then we headed to church. Tonight Aaron's mom, sister and family, and my grandma and aunts are coming over for dinner to help us celebrate this sweet boy.

His labor and delivery were so different from Eli and Micah's. He was 5 days late, and I had not experienced the 9th month of pregnancy before, so I was in for a VERY rude awakening! I went to the hospital so my mid-wife could break my water, and I sort of thought maybe I could do the whole natural childbirth thing. However, when I realized that was NOT something I wanted to do, he came so quickly the epidural did not have a chance to work. It was fast though, so that was very good! He was also so much bigger than the twins, 8.8lbs to their 5.8.

What I remember most about Isaac as an infant, is how much I feel like I enjoyed him. Having twins right off the bat was a very frantic experience for me. I never felt like I could just relax and enjoy them, it was always feeding, changing, and sleeping But with Isaac, I could take my time nursing, hold him a little longer, rock him a little more without having another baby waiting for me to finish.

Isaac is really talking up a storm these days. He is a little parrot and will repeat anything and everything you say. He is also great at climbing, jumping, and running. He basically runs everywhere he goes. I love when I get him dressed in the morning and as soon as his little toes hit the floor, he takes off! He is really loving being able to walk/run by himself when we go out, and often has this huge smile on his face. In fact when we left church today he was walking out the door on his own and someone said, "He looks so happy!"

Some of my favorite things he says and does are,
-"I did it!" (after doing just about everything)
-making a little gun with his fingers and shooting things (which does not sound all that cute, but his gun sound is like a little grunt)
-when he rides on your back or anything rides on anyone's back he calls it their backpack. So if he rides on Daddy's back, he is "Daddy's backpack"
-when Eli or Micah are bugging him he says in a very urgent voice to anyone around, "Wook, wook!"
-he loves to "rock rock" before nap or bed. He is still a cuddler! And at this point in time he still prefers me to rock him, and has asked for me instead of Dad. :) Which I just love! Being a mom with 3 boys, I have nothing over their dad, so when someone actually wants me instead of Dad, I eat that up!
-when he gives you a hug, he basically just leans into you
-he thinks he is four, that is how old he says he is when you ask him

Isaac, I love you so much! You are such a precious blessing to our family, you make us laugh, and amaze us with how much you are learning and how fast you are growing. Thank you for being such a light in our family!

daddy day

Last Saturday Aaron took all three boys on a "Daddy Day," for the entire day. It was part of my Mother's Day present, and it was awesome. He was so sweet about it, and really wanted to be out of the house the whole day, so he made all these plans. They left about 9:15 and got home at 5:30.They went to a park, Bounce U, McDonald's, fishing, and hiking. Just thinking about that is exhausting and super stressful to me! He said it was great, all except for some meltdowns about naptime when they were fishing. :)

It was such a gift to have that time to myself. Time to leisurely take a shower and get ready, casually browse through stores I never go to anymore, read on our porch swing, and visit a friend who had just had a baby. I fully appreciated it, and the sacrifice of my husband, giving up any downtime for himself so I could have a whole day.

It was also such a great reminder of how much I love my boys, and miss them and all their crazy noise when they are gone. All four of them crashed HARD that night, such great memories!

-The number of boys under 5 I have in my house
-The number of times I have moved in my whole life
-How many brothers I have
-How many months we have been on the waiting list!!!

3!!

We have now been on the waiting list for a little over 3 months. For some reason, I thought this time would be going by a bit more quickly than it is. Maybe that is partly because I start anticipating another month down, 2 weeks before we are there!

I have been thinking about our girl so much. She is always on my mind, but I have felt off and on much more of a burden for her. I have also been thinking about her birth family, especially her mother, and just praying that she/they would find healing and peace in Jesus. I also had the realization of how important my prayers are for her (duh!). My boys, and Aaron and I have entire families full of Godly men and women who pray for us faithfully. But my girl may not, and we might be the only ones she has who are praying for her. That may not be true, and I really hope it is not, but wow, if it is, how huge it is that we are praying faithfully for her!

I have started my required Hague adoption training and have been feeling a little overwhelmed. I haven't read anything completely new, but I think the reality has begun to hit me about how big international adoption really is. There are so many unknowns, and circumstances completely out of our control, and that can be pretty scary. Again, I knew this on some level, but reading hours and hours of articles really hammers it home! I know that God has led us here and will continue to lead us, and I am still as excited and pumped about adoption as ever, but I am realizing that it is so much more than that moment when you bring that child into your home. (of course!) There are questions that will probably never be answered, and circumstances we will never fully understand. I think what scares me the most is having our daughter grow up and have questions that we cannot adequately answer that will lead her to experience pain, rejection, isolation, and doubts about who she is. I hate thinking about not being able to comfort her and have the words to bring healing to her broken heart. I have been thinking a lot about how you talk to your child about their adoption, what to say, what not to say, how honest to be, how you explain abandonment, etc. I think one of the hardest parts is just all of the unknowns.

I guess the important thing is to focus on what I do know. What I know about God, His provision, His love, and His presence. It will be hard, there will be questions that have no answers, there will be things I can never understand. But we are not in this alone, and the One who has gone before us, is also going with us, and behind us, and I can place all my trust in Him.