REFERRAL!!!

So, I have been terrible at blogging lately, and have three other posts that I have started but never finished. Including two monthly updates about our referral wait for months 6 and 7. And then yesterday at about 2:45 or so we got THE CALL!!!

Let me begin by saying I was not expecting it to come until at least October, maybe even November. The average wait time has been 8ish months which would have put us in October. I just didn't want to get my hopes up too much. Anyway, Aaron thought it would be sooner, but it just wasn't really on my radar yet. I was trying to keep my phone closer to me and actually have it on ringer instead of vibrate though, just in case. So, I was folding clothes and my phone rang and it was a Texas number which made my heart jump just a little, and then when I answered it was our case worker, which made it jump a little more, but she was totally calm and didn't give me any reason to think anything until she said, "Well, this is it!" And then I freaked out! I couldn't breathe, I started crying, couldn't talk, but we somehow managed to figure out that I would call Aaron, have him come home, and then call her back.

Waiting for Aaron to come home (all 15 minutes of it) was excruciating! But finally he was here, and we sat down and called our caseworker and she sent us 9 pictures and all the info on our sweet baby girl. She is tiny, just 6 weeks old and not quite 6 pounds. She has huge dark eyes, lots of soft dark hair, and cute little lips. We can't post any pictures or her name on blogs or public sites until we pass court, but she is precious. My heart is aching to be with her, and I think the hardest part of this journey for us has just started. I am so thankful though, that she is safe and being cared for until we can be with her.

The courts are still closed, until September 28th, and then our agency will submit our files and we will wait for our court date, probably another 3 months or so after they open. Then we will travel for our courtdate, and then again for our embassy appointment. So, we still have several months yet to go, but lots to prepare and 3 other little guys here to keep us moving and busy.

Yesterday was a great day, thank you Lord for the gift of seeing her face.

Isaacisms

There are some super cute things that Isaac says that I want to get down before I forget them, because I know I will! He is talking so much, and almost always in sentences. I love hearing what he has to say, and how he says it. I should maybe start correcting him about some of them, so he actually learns how to say them at some point, but they are just too cute!

Some of my favorites:
Motorcycn-Motorcycle
Clip Clops- Flip Flops
Cecil- Cereal
Hippos- pillows

"That's grossy!" (says this mostly about food at dinnertime, kid is NOT into eating dinner)
"Meany Peany" (his go-to insult)

He is SUCH an easy kid one-on-one, so sweet and so cute. The trouble starts when the big brothers are around, and all too often, three is just a crowd. He competes for attention, and toys and tries to let us all know LOUD and clear that he is not a baby and will NOT be pushed around.

He also pushes limits more than the other two did. Literally tonight Aaron said jokingly, "Isaac, don't push it." And he replied, "I want to; push, push, push." He definitely challenges me on new levels, but also melts my heart in new ways, and I cherish my moments with him.

5

*this picture has nothing to do with our adoption, but I was looking
for something with the number 5 in it, and there are five kiddos! Our
boys plus their cousins. :)


Friday marked month 5 of being on the waiting list. I did it again to myself, started anticipating it a couple of weeks before, so on the actual day it seemed like it should have actually been month 6. But, I feel pretty confident that we are over the half-way point with waiting for the referral. The longest anyone has waited for a child in our age range, is 8 1/2 months, so we are getting closer!

I go through different times of being incredibly excited and positive, to other times when I feel worried and overwhelmed about the responsibility we are taking on. Raising a child from another culture we know nothing about, bonding/attaching, the changes our family will experience, etc. I feel more strongly about adoption than ever, and can NOT WAIT to meet our daughter, but sometimes I just feel really freaked out.

I have started praying with the boys individually in their beds, and every night Micah wants to pray for "baby Hope." They have started talking more about her too. Even Isaac. Last Sunday I went to get him from the nursery and he saw a car seat sitting on the floor. He asked, "Baby Hope in there?" And his teacher overheard and said he had been talking about her! Too cute!

Daddy's trip

This summer is suddenly flying by. To me it seemed like May dragged on a bit, but then I blinked and June was over!
Aaron left this morning for a trip to Zambia. This is his fourth time to go, first time leading the trip. I already miss him like crazy, but I also just feel so proud of him. He has had a heart for missions since I think high school, and pictured himself being a full-time missionary overseas. That obviously hasn't happened yet, but I am so thankful for the opportunities he has had to share this love with others. And I feel like finally I am at a point where I understand more of this love he has, and can fully support him in it. And for the first time, I wish I could have gone too.

It is definitely a lot of work for everyone involved. I don't think Aaron has gone to bed before midnight for about the last two weeks, just trying to prepare not only for the trip, but also work stuff while he is gone. But he handles it with such grace and strength. And he still takes care of us too. Checking in with me consistently to see if I need him to do anything, and playing and being with the boys, making sure they are in bed before holing up in his office! :)
There were some tears this morning from Micah, and Eli was really sad on the way home. Isaac saw Aaron's truck when we got back home from the airport, and announced, "Daddy's home!", so I don't think he quite knows what is going on. :)

I started this a few days ago, so here is a little update on what we have been up to while Daddy is gone.
1. My mom came! Woo Hoo! Having her here is always such a joy, and it has been a tremendous help especially with Aaron gone.
2. Fish! Eli and Micah convinced their Nana they needed pets, and so she bought them betas, which they named Jack (Micah) and Bolt (Eli). Eli changed the name of his fish, I think 4 times. First it was Harry, then Angelfire, then Fireangel, and now Bolt.
3. Toy Story! I took Eli and Micah to see Toy Story 3 while Isaac finished his nap with Nana. They loved it, although Micah got a little scared.
4. Pizza, hamburgers, and donuts! Just tradition when Nana comes.
5. Project! The boys made t-shirts with Nana and I today. Micah wanted a race track, and Eli wanted a rainbow, snakes, and water with a boat and fish. Isaac's has different sports balls on it.
6. Picnics and the park! We are trying to wear the boys out each day, so going to the park and having a picnic is a great way to do that. Especially when the park is on the other side of a 1/2 mile pedestrian bridge!

So, all in all we are having fun and staying busy. Eli did say last night that he, "didn't feel good, he didn't feel right, he missed daddy." He seems the most affected at this point, but I know Micah and Isaac miss him too, they just don't verbalize it the same way.

I have had a great week with the boys and just wanted to document that! :) We all had to go grocery shopping together Monday, which I normally avoid at all costs, but had no other good options this week. It definitely had the potential to be horrible, being we had to go to two stores, and one of them was Wal-Mart, but the boys did great. The little bag of snacks I brought for them was a major contributing factor in that I think.
The next day we went to the library, which also has the potential of being horrible. Mostly because of Isaac. He gets this desire to run and scream when I bring him back, which always sounds amplified in a hushed library. But he did not do that this time, he stayed right with me! And for once we were not the noisiest family there! Woo Hoo! I have so much compassion for moms with little ones who are just being little ones and all that that entails, but I also have to say I felt so relieved to have boys that behaved for once, and that I did not vow to never return there again on our way out! :)
Today has also gone well. We all made summer journals together, which I saw on several other blogs, and practiced writing in them today. My goal for the boys is to have them be able to write their names by the end of the summer, so today we practiced their first letters, E and M. Isaac has one too, but his will be filled whatever his little heart desires. Currently, lots and lots of scribbles. :) I have also been seriously considering trying homeschooling, at least for preschool and kindergarten, so I think it will be a good introduction to that too. After that we read on the porch swing for almost an hour, those boys will read FOREVER, ate an early lunch and headed to the pool! I have never taken the three of them by myself, but we have this great little leisure pool right down the street. It is only 2 feet deep and zero entry, so it's perfect for them right now. Eli and Micah loved it and Isaac did too, so I am thinking that may become a new fun thing for us to do.
Anyway, I know that things sort of swing like a pendulum around here from great to not so great, and I wanted to make sure and get down a week that is going great!

There is No Me Without You

I just finished this book, There is No Me Without You, by Melissa Fay Green. I have been thinking about it nonstop since I started it, and really do not have the words to describe what is has done to my heart. Broken it, stirred it, compelled it, motivated it, all would apply. There is no way I can adequately describe or explain what is going on in Ethiopia, and really all over the world concerning orphans, but if you want a picture of it, read this book. And we all should be aware of these needs.
It is about an Ethiopian woman who found herself taking in orphans, many of them orphaned by AIDS, and the stories behind the statistics. You can really get lost in statistics, they becomes just numbers and not people, they don't seem real, there is no connection. But, when you get to know who those statistics are, when you see a face, hear a name, or hear a story, it changes everything. I read about a 3 year old girl and her 1 year old brother who watched both parents suffer a painful death from AIDS, and then go through more heart wrenching trauma when their remaining family members left them in an orphanage so they would not die of starvation. I was overwhelmed thinking about all of these children who need help, who are suffering in every way imaginable. And literally millions more, just in Ethiopia alone whose stories were not written down, but are in the same situation or even worse.
I have begun to realize how much of my life is about my comfort. I spend my days trying to make things easier for myself, looking forward to the next fun thing we have coming up, or my next opportunity to have a break and spend some time by myself. Meanwhile, children are suffering and dying, many of them alone. Is there a worse thought than that? A child in pain, with no one to hold and comfort them?
A couple of days ago Isaac was having some tummy trouble, and had a blowout diaper in his bed, requiring a bath, clean sheets and fresh pajamas. The thought that kept coming into my mind was, what about all the kids who don't have anyone to clean them up when they are sick? No one to gently wash them up, change them and rock them back to sleep?
I also have been thinking a lot about why I was chosen to grow up in America, with more than enough of everything. Could a big part of that reason be, so I could help others? So I could be an answer to someone's prayers? I remember from another book, The Hole in Our Gospel, that the author, Richard Stearns had traveled to another country and helped a woman in poverty. I think he helped her medically, but am not totally sure. Anyway, he wrote that she had been praying for years that God would provide for her. And God did provide, through this man. I just can't help but feel that there is so much more than working your whole life for a nice house, fashionable clothes, and fun vacations. Maybe part of that "more" is being an answer to someone else's prayers.
I know that nothing I am writing is new or things that we have never heard before, I have heard these things my whole life. But something is changing in my heart, and I am completely convinced that what I am currently doing to help orphans is no where near enough, and probably never will be.

My parents came and spent about a week with us in the beginning of June. We absolutely LOVE spending time with them, and were counting down both the days before they came, and also how many days we had left with them once they were here. We have definitely developed some traditions when they come and stay with us including, pizza, doughnuts, hamburgers, reading books, and on this visit, swinging on the front porch swing.
I have always been close with my parents, and so very thankful for them, but living far away really heightens those feelings. I treasure the time we get to spend together, look forward to it so much and do not take if for granted.
This visit my dad wanted to be available to help my aunts and grandma with things around their house since my grandpa passed away, but he still found time to mow, paint our van, and help my mom wash all of our downstairs windows. I also think I only cooked dinner twice, they either took us out, or my mom even made dinner one evening. Seriously, they are such a tremendous blessing to us, and I am SO thankful my boys have them as their Papa and Nana.